The Arabs are coming!

American anti-Arab hysteria reached a new peak this week with the revelation that the United Arab Emirates-based Dubai Ports World may soon be managing some U.S. ports. Americans, who typically have no problem selling anything to anyone, (particularly weapons) have suddenly gone all weak in the knees at the thought of foreigners running a U.S. port. As one of the always-literate commenters at the international capital of hating the Arabs, Little Green Footballs writes, "UAE is no friend of the USA and the Civilzed (sic) World."

I'll tell you, if the UAE made cars, I'm sure we'd be seeing people out smashing them up like they did in the good old days of hating the Japanese. Remember when they tried to buy the Seattle Mariners? You would have thought the Japanese were sending over another fleet to screw up another attack on Pearl Harbor.

The only thing that surprises me about this situation is that the preznit is actually on the side of making the deal. Then again, he never has been one to let anything get in the way of money exchanging hands between consenting adults -- just as long as one or both of them is a crook.

Everyone else seems to think that the UAE is dumb enough to send saboteurs over to incinerate Newark or something. People always say that the business of America is business, but I say that catch-phrase should belong to the Emirates, the global center of anything-goes capitalism. My friends, we're talking about people who are building a $500 million underwater hotel. This is clearly not a country that wants to jeopardize it's insane oil wealth for the sake of murdering Americans. It's a country that wants to keep the party going for every last minute until the oil runs out.

It is also a country that has been very cooperative in the war that will never end until Republicans leave office The War on Terruh. They have been Very Well-Behaved Arabs who eat their broccoli and lima beans and never speak to Uncle Sam unless spoken to. They have also been such good partners because, you know, they don't respect the Geneva Conventions either. You can see why George W. Bush -- who has never met an international treaty he wouldn't like to flush down the toilet after setting in on fire, would get along with these folks.

Dubai Ports World actually has a very good reputation. Now, I'm open to the argument that the U.S. government should be running U.S. ports, instead of for-profit corporations. That's the kind of reasoning that might appeal to me. But can you imagine that there would be an instinctive reaction if a Swiss company had done this? Even the French could probably get away with running our ports, despite the fact that a number of Republican public intellectuals seem to want to refight the battle of the Somme with American soldiers playing the part of the Germans.

The most pernicious manifestation of this syndrome is the tendency to define any Arab-majority country as "the enemy." New Jersey Sen. Robert Menendez said "This sale is especially troubling because of the UAE's questionable track record. Two of the 9/11 hijackers were from the UAE." According to such third-grade logic, we shouldn't sell to an American firm either because Timothy McVeigh pulled off the Oklahoma City bombings in 1995.

If we truly want to help change attitudes about the United States in the Arab world, we can't do things like this. We can't say, "We'd really love for you to like us and to eat nachos with us while we watch Monday Night Football, but the truth is that we don't like you either and you definitely can't buy our stuff." This is a public relations strategy brought to you straight from the creators of Pajamas Media.

In other words, it sucks. And for once, I have to say that (gulp) I agree with George W. Bush about something. Kind of. With addenda. And my fingers crossed.