Thursday, December 28, 2006

Bye bye Ricky Poo

The latest for the Citypaper: A farewell to Rick Santorum.

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Monday, December 25, 2006

Where Republican Governance Leads....

Well they can't run the state or the country, but those Republicans -- they sure know how to rename things after Ronald Reagan. I'm sure it's only a matter of time before the Internets themselves get named for the Gipper. Note to the Jersey GOP: this is probably not the way you want to position yourselves against the corrupt Democratic establishment.

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Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Long live our alliance with Libya

Your friend and mine in the Global War on Terror has just convicted a bunch of innocent foreigners on ridiculous charges of infecting children with HIV. They will be executed. But you see, Qaddafi is a good Arab and Saddam was a bad Arab. You understand the difference, right?


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Thursday, December 14, 2006

Michael Kinsley's ridiculous article on Jimmy Carter's new book

As if anyone needed more evidence that the mainstream American left doesn't care at all about Palestinians or even understand the problem, along comes Michael Kinsley with a really idiotic review of Jimmy Carter's book, Palestine: Peace Not Apartheid. Kinsley argues that the Palestinians aren't as bad off as the South African blacks because, after all, they have citizenship in Israel. Of course, Carter wasn't talking about the Palestinians in Israel but rather the millions of citizenship-less, unemployed Palestinians trapped behind fences in Gaza and the West Bank. The fact that Kinsely avoids talking about those Palestinians -- whose situation does have certain parallels with South Africa -- indicates one of two things to me. Either Kinsley doesn't have the tiniest clue what he's talking about, or he's deliberately misrepresenting Carter's book. You have to think that a pundit who's been around as long as Kinsley would know the elementary facts of this conflict, so I'm going to go with deliberate misrepresentation.

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Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Stop dogging on the fans

So I see the intrepid Philly sports writers have climbed aboard the Bash the Fans bandwagon. I guess they're out of mean things to say about our wretched sports teams, so it's time to go after the paying customers. Before Monday night's Eagles game against Carolina, ESPN did an excruciatingly long feature story on the Snowballing of Santa -- a boilerplate story that apparently must be mentioned every time a major national sporting event takes place in this city. You had to know that Gov. Rendell - who was at the game in question -- would be hauled out to talk about it too. This 38-year-old event is trotted out by the media to demonstrate what callous boors the fans in this city are, even though we aren't the ones who started a riot on disco demolition night, destroyed the city after a championship, or started a globally-broadcast melee from the stands. And I sort of don't think the infamous 1995 forfeit - in which Dodgers fans tossed hundreds of souvenier baseballs at players and umpires - gets mentioned every single time they broadcast a game from L.A.

But it got worse during the game. At one point the Panthers absolutely laid Jeff Garcia out with a brutal hit, and backup A.J. Feeley put on a helmet and started onto the field. But Garcia pulled himself off the mat and waved Feeley away, and the Philadelphia fans committed the terrible crime of booing. From the announcers' reactions you would have thought the fans had caught a flight to Darfur and slaughtered some villagers. Hey Lords of Decency: Philly fans like A.J. Feeley and think he should be starting, with or without one lonely 3 touchdown performance from Garcia. That means we are going to boo Jeff Garcia. Deal with it. And maybe visit some other stadiums around this country, where they boo people all the damn time, even in Baseball Heaven out in St. Louis. Wankers.

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Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Capturing the social libertarians

God hath declared it illegal to gamble at this table

A friend of mine who basically makes his living playing online poker is despondent about the fate of, which is in the process of booting all of its U.S.-based players because of yet another idiotic law passed by the 109th debating society Congress -- which made it much more difficult for online gaming organizations to deal with U.S. players. Some little countries to our South are so pissed off about this that they're taking it to the WTO, where they will probably beat us. There is no legitimate argument that the government can make on behalf of the new law, and they know it.

As others have eloquently pointed out, making poker and other forms of online gambling illegal is counterproductive and pointless. People will figure out how to get around the laws, and the only people who will profit are either criminals or businesses based in other countries. If there are legions of mediocre poker players out there who want to give their money to poker sharks like my friend, then who am I or the U.S. government to stop them from doing so? The new gambling law is yet another example of how the Southern evangelical mode of thinking and social regulation has captured the public debate and made meaningful reform impossible. While banning online gambling is not the same kind of problem as the useless and globally destructive Drug War, it is representative of a certain kind of lawmaking.

I think there is a silent majority in this country that wants to be left alone to play poker, bet on football, pick up hookers, smoke joints, and find a nice doctor to euthanize them when they're ready to die. In other words, there's a silent majority of fun people in this country who want glassy-eyed scolds like Rick Santorum talking to them about sex, dying, and gambling about as much as they want to see Bill Bennett naked. And there is a major political vacuum waiting to be filled -- which is currently populated only by the far left and the libertarian party, neither of which has a great deal of influence on discourse in this country. The Democrats should recognize their historic opportunity to seize the social libertarian agenda and run with it. If people had any idea of size of the government-funded Leviathan that's being used to fight the drug war -- a "war" that can never be won unless Americans can be convinced to stop putting things that make them feel good up their noses -- they might adjust their voting priorities.

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